“Oh, you want to get pregnant; you should go see Larry.” Ba dum dum!
Vince Lasorso, a friend and colleague recently told me this is his first response to women who request help in conceiving a child or carrying it to term. And then he says, “Maybe I should rephrase that. Larry has had success in helping women undergoing in vitro fertilization (IVF) to conceive and have children.”
It started over 20 years ago, when a young woman confided to Vince that she had undergone several IVF treatments without successfully carrying to term. The doctors could find no physiological reason for this. Vince from Whatever Works Wellness Center and White Willow School of Tai Chi, knew of my NLP practice and suggested she call me for an appointment. We met for a few sessions in which we discovered a psychological issue that appeared significant and was easily addressed. She had another procedure, conceived and gave birth to a daughter, whom she and her husband named Grace.
Within weeks after the birth, mom referred another woman who she had met in a women’s support group. In the NLP sessions with this second woman, we discovered a very different kind of psychological barrier which again was as easily addressed. She gave birth to triplets.
And then yet another referral came from the mother of Grace. The next woman gave birth to twins. All of these women had struggled for some time trying to conceive with the best medicine of the day. I saw each of them for a small number of sessions and they each felt strongly that their work with me was the difference that made the difference in a successful pregnancy and birth.
Slow forward twenty-one years to when Grace is now a young adult. Her mom, the first woman who came to me for issues of infertility, called and brought me up to date on her life. And then mentioned that she had a friend who lives out of state but is having the same kind of problem around conceiving. Could I help? Absolutely. The friend called and it happened that the next weekend she was coming to Ohio, and so we were able to have a face-to-face session that included her husband. And we agreed to continue to meet via live video sessions. We had five sessions about a week apart and then off she went for another IVF procedure. I didn’t hear anything from her for some of time, but then an email arrived reporting that she was four weeks pregnant and she just knew she was carrying twins because she wanted twins. Two weeks later she called with the exciting news. She was indeed pregnant with twins.
Pregnancy factors other than fertility treatments
So, why am I reporting this? It is because each of these situations represent examples of how mind-body-spirit are intricately connected. For each of these women, there were internal thoughts or feelings that they (and I) believe were impacting their capacity to conceive and carry to term. I am not saying that this is true for all couples who have difficulty conceiving. But these four women are convinced that their work with mind and spirit was a big piece of the solution to having a healthy baby.
The evidence is mounting that thoughts, thought patterns, mental and spiritual states are involved in wellness and healing. We now know that trauma even changes DNA, and is handed down for two to three generations. More and more physicians are becoming aware that wellness and healing is a process that involves the whole person. Patient intuition and beliefs have an enormous impact on protocol outcomes. This became crystal clear to me in the 1990’s when I was facilitating a cancer support group. Those people used their intuition, imagination and beliefs to get the best possible treatment outcomes. Their physicians explained protocols but the person made choices. Many of them became experts on the nature of the disease and certainly of their bodies. Not all fully recovered, but all had fewer unwanted effects of treatment and all had a higher than normal quality of life during the course of treatment.
I should state that I am not saying that NLP will “cure” all physical difficulties. But I believe it can be an important part of being resilient not only in times of challenge, but also in times of opportunity. One’s beliefs and attitudes influence health, illness, treatment, and the course of recovery.
My encouragement for you: Be aware of your mental and spiritual state, especially during times of physical distress. What do you believe about yourself, your physician and treatment? What do you believe about the physical problem itself? If those beliefs are limiting, if they create hopelessness or fear rather than hope and confidence, talk to someone who can help you change those beliefs.